It's time...

2012 is going to be rad I can feel it.

Already lined up a holiday in April.
Lined up a new client - whos clothing I adore.
Spent the last part of 2011 saving for my tax/holiday money/whatever I want.

I know that last part probably sounds like any normal person but I've never been able to save in my entire life! I'm almost to a grand and my credit card is completely wiped (again always been shit with that) just feels good to know that I'm finally putting away a decent amount each month. Also, good to know that the money I'm saving I'm not missing throughout the month. I guess as I'm freelance I get paid at random times (12th of the month, end of the month and every week) I'm not paying for any travel and barely paying for any food. Saying that I am paying some rent to the 'rents (ahem), phone (which is hefty 'cause I have to use it for work a lot), insurance for macbook and phone etc etc etc.

Went to London weekend just gone. Went to Soulwamas. Not sure if it's my age (I'm 24) or what but I was fucking over it before it even began. The music was good it was just the people. Proper little wankers pilled up bumping into me and even worse thrusting themselves up against me, had to get angry with one of them and tell him where to stick it.

Even though I had 4 mango vodkas and diet lemonade, a shot of Sambuca and two pints of Cider I still remained relatively sober...Weird huh? Maybe because I wasn't feeling the evening I didn't get drunk? Who knows.

I came back on the Sunday and spent the WHOLE of my train journey looking for a flat in London. I'm thinking a limit of all incl. for £600 would do. Again, travel wouldn't be needed as I'll be working from home. Obviously I would need to travel somewhere at some point but I'm thinking of living in or around Fulham to be close to my Sister. I saw a real cute place, with three other girls who are sociable but like a chiller by themselves too for £450 all incl. in Fulham...I contacted the former flatmate and she told me the place had gone - super gutted...In hindsight I think seeing what my tax amount is going to be and going on a couple of holiday's next year would be a lot better then moving up and rushing about straight away...I can always visit!

I honestly wish everyone the best success, happiness and 2012 fun times. 2011 has been good to be and it's been bad to me but what's the rough without the smooth aye?

xxx

My gorgeous friend Lailah sent me this! xxx

Mango vodka!

Blog me

So, since I was 14 I have been writing about my life online. I used to use Livejournal.com - this was somewhat tragic as my brain used to literally spill out, topic of most conversations was alcohol, boys, daydreaming about boys whilst at school, not doing that well at school 'cause all I wanted to do was be online and make websites, my somewhat concerned Mother who I thought at the time was being totally unreasonable and awful to me and about me.

10 years on and I am still blogging and geeking out. Sometimes I feel my best when I'm behind a computer screen - this is always something I've wanted to do and I've said on many occasion that I am overwhelmed by my creative blogs success and I am overwhelmed with people's response to me as a worker and person. I've reached a milestone this year by creating work for myself through freelance and trawling through websites. I'm so proud of where I am at and I only hope that my little ditzy, creative, fun filled, crazy mind continues to bring happiness, love and joy not only into my heart but my soul.

It's not only blogging (PR) that's made me so stoked this year it's the incredible people that I've met and already knew that have opened up my eyes to so many wonderful things.

I used to be quite shy and I used to be such a nervous un-confident wreck - thanks to my friends and my family I've become someone I never really thought I would be - this is turning into some thank you for accepting me speech huh?

A couple of people have noted that I'm 'over sensitive' to life and achievements I can assure you I don't sit in my room crying when I get an e-mail from a rad magazine or blogger for features within work. I am passionate and caring through every aspect of my life and I think that shows willing to succeed and be the best person you can be. I'm struggling with some other stuff and as I've got older I've become more feisty (whoops) but let's face it I was such a puss before...I totally had an anxiety moment last week. I was freaking the fuck out, everything was such a mental mare - nothing to wear (I clearly do, my wardrobe is BULGING with stuff), face was a mare (I'm not the ugliest person in the world!), I couldn't find my phone or wallet which stressed me the fuck out...When I went to meet my bum chum Christine was still freaking out...Does this mean I'm mental and I can't cope with my life?

Anyways, not too sure what the purpose of this is about, like I said a total brain spill for me. I'll probably read back on this in a few weeks and LOL but right now it seems fitting.







Halloween I did jack shit. Went to Chelsea had a chiller, did some shopping (I <3 Spitalfields) ate some food - first Nandos & Hummingbird bakery ever. Saw some babes. Went to see Incubus with Emma the week after. Ahhh Brandon Boyd is still a massive hunk. Hung out with the babes in the Natural History Museum - ate my first ever Subway...Steak and cheese melt, was yum! Went to Brixton for the Fireworks - pretty gnarly.


My friend Lailah saw a Barnes bus and put it on her Instagram. We joked about how we should fill it with babes boys and have a little party.


I saw my little lambies this week which was lovely. It's always good to get out and about and roll around (literally) and be silly. Steph's 25th on Saturday - WOAH.
Winter Wonderland next week, has anyone been? Is it good? Then before we know it my sister is back from Australia and it's fucking Christmas (yes, I needed to add 'fucking' there) dudes. Then the most shit month of the entire year - January...Then a even more pointless time of the month, then my Birthday and PARTY PARTY PARTY (more about that soon) then Summer with no sunshine I bet, then Christmas again. Oh and hopefully time to squezze in NYC and Barcelona - pumped.




Pictures.

Holy shit!

So, no update on my personal life since August huh? Well, I've been stoked on my life for a while now.

Left one of my jobs, was ace, good brands, good people but I was working weekends and it became a depressing chore rather then a fun exciting career move. Bit the bullet and decide to leave. Left on good terms which is always nice, I always seem to leave jobs on good times, maybe 'cause I'm such a nice babe...Who knows.


So, moving on, more hours with Street Casuals and within a few weeks of leaving the marketing company I've joined two new beautiful amazing exciting companies. Free to Be Supreme and Tramp Boutique. I'm totally pumped to start with both companies. So please check them out here and here. I will be in charge of their twitter and Facebook as well as doing their PR - so exciting, I'm such a nerd it's unreal - who would of thought me geeking out at the age of 13 maintaning my No Doubt fan website (NERD!) and blogging on Livejournal would become my career, it's totally unreal.

Part from work which I'm in love with, I've been pumped on social activites - mainly London based fun with the sis, babes and beautiful friends as well as sticking to my roots and hanging with my Eastbourne babes. xxx

I got to see my Tristan again after three years, fucking stoked - was so weird. I spotted him in the kitchen went in and tapped him on the shoulder and it was the raddest feeling we didn't know what to do except for hug and be like HEYYYYY and hug and then run outside for catch ups. He's amazing. I cried when he left though, what fucking loser. xxxxx

Selection of piccies from the past 3 months.

Taking Mr.Roar on a walkie.

Birdworld with Christine. xxx

Pub times with Joanna. xxx

Roar enjoying the sunshine.

Me before Lazy Oaf's press event.

Me being bored in the laundrette.

Old school friend James, haven't seen him in YEARS and Orchie. xxx

Brighton hangtime with Lai. xxx

Danny looking hot to trot. xxx

Tshepo, Olivia and I. xxx

I'm in love with this photograph. xxx

NO DOUBT. xxx

Very random find on the way to the pub with Katie. xxx

WOWIE! xxx

Lai and Luke at Jack's party. xxx

Dead roses at Fran's flat.

Hungover at Raysteade.

Gorgeous painting in the Hollywood.

Jimmy in the station after Deftones. xxx

Tom and I in a pub before Deftones. xxx

Cheers Guy! xxx

Love a roast! xxx

Banksy and MJ in Brighton. xxx

Fran's shoes and mine. xxx

Early Christmas present from my sister. xxx

Pretty busy lady.

So, since I last updated I have gone to London numerous times for Lovebox, Wireless and general activities. Brighton a few times for hang outs, meetings etc. I have also completed the street art summer competition for Don't Panic and successfully carried out the Playgroup Festival project - lovely.

This weekend has been my favourite of them all though, I finally got to see my best friend from University after 3 years. Tears happened and the general 'Oh my god, I can't believe we are here with each other again, i love you" happened a lot...It's so strange to have that feeling of nothing but utter love for someone, someone that I can trust with my life and that if he was pissing me off I can sort him out and vice versa...I don't think there's every really been someone so amazing in my life. We've made a pact to not let it be another 3 years until we see each other...When he left to go home, we cried. So pathetic but hey! That's love for you.

I ended up in Swindon's Great Western Hospital yesterday with Lailah who had unfortunately been stung by a wasp and had to have adrenaline pumped into her and she went into an aphaletic shock, which was super scary but she turned out okay. If we hadn't of called an Ambulance she probably would have died which is insane! Glad little LaLa is okay.

Summer Strawberries.

Batcave at Longleat.

Models Own 'Sophies Pink' and Flying A's glitter.

Sunset.

Dinosaurs in Brighton.

LaLa in Hospital.

Deer at Longleat.

Lovebox.

Snacks on the way to Lovebox.

I know who I am, but who are you?

I've been re-reading The Bell Jar recently whether that's a good idea or not I'm not sure. I first read it when Gwen Stefani said she quoted it in some of the songs on Return Of Saturn (Loser I know!) also, shortly after finding this out I found out that the words Wiona Ryder writes in her diary in Girl Interupted is also from the book.

Here are some of my favourite quotes from the book:


The silence depressed me. It wasn't the silence of silence. It was my own silence. ~Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar


I saw my life branching out before me like the green fig tree in the story. From the tip of every branch, like a fat purple fig, a wonderful future beckoned and winked. One fig was a husband and a happy home and children, and another fig was a famous poet and another fig was a brilliant professor, and another fig was Ee Gee, the amazing editor, and another fig was Europe and Africa and South America, and another fig was Constantin and Socrates and Attila and a pack of other lovers with queer names and offbeat professions, and another fig was an Olympic lady crew champion, and beyond and above these figs were many more figs I couldn't quite make out. I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, starving to death, just because I couldn't make up my mind which of the figs I would choose. I wanted each and every one of them, but choosing one meant losing all the rest, and, as I sat there, unable to decide, the figs began to wrinkle and go black, and, one by one, they plopped to the ground at my feet. ~Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar, Chapter 7



If neurotic is wanting two mutually exclusive things at one and the same time, then I'm neurotic as hell. I'll be flying back and forth between one mutually exclusive thing and another for the rest of my days. ~Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar, Chapter 8

There is something demoralizing about watching two people get more and more crazy about each other, especially when you are the extra person in the room."
- Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar, Chapter 2


The sickness rolled through me in great waves. After each wave it would fade away and leave me limp as a wet leaf and shivering all over and then I would feel it rising up in me again, and the glittering white torture chamber tiles under my feet and over my head and all four sides closed in and squeezed me to pieces.
- Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar, Chapter 4

I felt my lungs inflate with the onrush of scenery—air, mountains, trees, people. I thought, 'This is what it is to be happy.'"
- Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar, Chapter 8

After reading these you will probably assume that I am in some shiverled mess about my life but to be honest I couldn't be happier right now. A few heart pangs are occuring and I'm trying to figure out if that is because I really care or if it's because, actually in reality I am a cold hearted bitch...

I remember writing all my stories about my life on livejournal - something that I'm very happy that I did do, I think it's important to write down your life, your passion, your fashion! As I become a touch typer aged 13 I felt that doing this online was the best way as writing it in a journal wasn't as easy for me as I couldn't allow myself to write as fast as my brain was thinking...I do wonder sometimes that life is just full of rules and if I say something that I strongly believe in I'm deemed a bitch...But I'm I? Least I'm honest...Ho hum!




In other news, I am doing a competition with Channel 4 and Don't Panic you can check it out here. Some really nice stuff is coming through and hopefully it's been sent off to the write people for some decent coverage. If you'd like more information please contact me on stephanie@dontpaniconline.com




In other other news, I'm completely in love with the idea of three of my best friends and I going to Longleat! HELLO little animals xxx and stately home and three of the best people in my life HELLO!!!

I LOVE this song and No Doubt are releasing an album real soon and I might piss myself when I go and see them because I am THAT excited...It would make my life for realz